Illusion...

A mosaic, hundreds of little pieces broken and shattered
to form something beautiful.

Each piece tells a story,
a part of something greater.
They are all connected but also independent of one another.

A joyful magenta forms the clothing of the portrait person.
A covering for her heart,
for her body,
for her soul.

A muted yellow for her perfect curls,
the ringlets frame her face,
thats strained to form that "natural smile"

On the outside she's a gorgeous Barbie doll,
made up of beautiful pieces; shards of emeralds for her eyes,
perfect peach pieces for her skin.
Beautiful.

No one sees the darkness that lies within.
The hurt that serges in her heart,
the devastation that lines her face.

The shards and broken pieces get ignored,
while the "beautiful Barbie girl" is embraced.


What does this say to us? What does this say to me. I feel like I am like the Barbie doll. I don't see myself as beautiful but I do feel the conflict between who I am and who I feel like I want to be. I want to be that girl. I don't want to deal with all the hurt, the lies and the crap thats filled my life. I just hope that in wading through the muck I will find someone who embraces me for me. That the broken and the beautiful will be loved. That both will be acknowledged and embraced. I want the fairy tale with me as me. Don't make me be the barbie.